


Now I Can Move Forward

by TVXQmamacita



Series: The Road of Love [1]
Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Death, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-31 00:45:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15108224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TVXQmamacita/pseuds/TVXQmamacita
Summary: Yunho learns to cope with loss, while Changmin tries to heal his broken heart."Road" AU





	Now I Can Move Forward

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fic based off TVXQ's latest "Road" MV because that MV was a work of art.

Yunho hated this. He hated this with every fiber of his being.

He laughed, not even trying to stop the tears falling from his eyes.

His father smiled weakly. “I want to see you smile everyday, Yunho,” he said. “No matter what.”

Yunho gripped his father’s hand even tighter. “How can I do that?” he asked in response, his voice trembling with every word. “You’re leaving me. You’re leaving me just like mom left us.”

“You know your mother would have stayed with us if she could,” his father defended. “She loved us both so much. It’s not her fault that cancer took her from us.”

Yunho sobbed, placing his free hand over his mouth as he tried to muffle the pathetic sounds emitting from his mouth. He remembered his father constantly telling him not cry about this, but that was one command from his father that Yunho couldn’t obey. His father was dying, there was no way Yunho could just brush off that fact.

“And Yunho,” his father continued. “I miss your mother so much. And now I can finally be with her. She’s the love of my life.”

“But what about me?” Yunho knew he sounded like a selfish child. But losing his mother was hard enough. Not to mention, that when his mother died, Yunho still had his father, and the two of them supported each other during their time of grief.

Who was Yunho supposed to turn to once his father finally died?

“Yunho. You really don’t see how strong you are, do you?”

Yunho bit his lip. With the way he was acting right now, he wasn’t sure about this imaginary strength his father just mentioned.

“I know I don’t have to worry about you,” his father continued. “I can leave peacefully knowing that you’ll be fine.”

Yunho shook his head. “But...I’m not ready for you to go.”

“You know I’ll always be with you, son,” his father said. “You mean so much to me, and I would never abandon you. You have my word.”

Yunho nodded, wiping his tears away.

“On the table,” his father said suddenly. “My watch is there.”

Yunho reached over to the bedside table, grabbing the bronze pocket watch that laid on the table next to a vase of flowers. He opened the latch, revealing the ticking clock.

“My father gave this to me before he passed on, do you remember?”

Yunho nodded. He did remember that day. Yunho was just a child when his grandfather died, and he remembered how shocked he was to watch his father cry so much. His father was practically unconsolable at that time, and Yunho was understanding that pain now more than ever.

“I want you to have it now.”

Yunho closed the watch, holding it tightly in his hand.

“I don’t want you to ever feel alone. I want you to always remember that your mother and I are with you.” His father smiled. “Your grandmother gave that watch to your grandfather when they got married. It never stopped ticking when he had it, and it never stopped ticking when I had it. Isn’t that amazing?”

Yunho nodded.

“I don’t want you to close yourself off,” he continued. “You have someone out there that loves you. And when you find that person, make sure you hold on. Love makes time move forward. Having someone to love is one of the greatest feelings, and I’m upset that I won’t be by your side when it happens. But I know you’ll find that perfect person. And when you do find the one, every second you spend with that person will feel like paradise.” He laughed. “Yunho, you’re so clumsy and lose almost everything. But please, don’t lose this watch, and most importantly, don’t lose the kindness in your heart. That always was your best quality.”

Yunho laughed painfully again. “Dad...I...I love you so much.”

Yunho’s father smiled. “I love you too, Yunho. I love you very much.”

* * *

Yunho was there when his father’s heart finally stopped beating.

It was 3 o’clock in the morning when the doctor made the horrid announcement.

His father was dead.

* * *

“We’re sorry, Changmin,” the older man said. “The company had to make some cuts. I’m sorry but...we’re going to have to let you go.”

When his boss made the announcement that he was being let go, Changmin was sure he was supposed to cry, feel angry, beg for his job, or maybe even punch a wall.

But Changmin didn’t do any of that. He bowed politely, muttered a word of thanks, and quietly made his leave.

Changmin wasn’t sure why he wasn’t reacting to this news. Getting fired from the job was always a cause of distress, he knew that was a fact.

He walked home, refusing to take the bus today because he needed the walk to clear his head.

_I’m coming home early, I guess. My boss let me go._

He hadn’t gotten a reply from his girlfriend yet, but Changmin didn’t think too much of it.

By the time he made it to his apartment, Changmin was tired. That was strange to him, because such a walk usually wasn’t a challenge at all. Maybe this was his body’s subtle way of reacting to the news.

He approached his door and pressed the code onto the keypad.

When Changmin opened the door, it felt as if someone had suddenly punched him in chest.

He couldn’t breathe, his hands were shaking, and he wondered when the room would stop spinning.

“Ch-Changmin,” his girlfriend stammered. Her eyes widened as she rose from the couch in the living room.

Changmin stumbled backwards as he looked at his girlfriend and the man he caught her kissing just a few seconds ago.

Did that really happen?

This wasn’t real. There was no way any of this was real. Changmin and his girlfriend loved each other more than anything. They devoted their whole lives to each other. There was no way she would bring another man into _their_ own apartment and-

Maybe this guy forced himself on her, and Changmin walked in right on time to stop this whole thing from getting worse.

That was the only explanation that made sense.

But no matter how hard Changmin tried, he couldn’t speak. Why was it so hard to speak?

He looked to the man on the couch, still wearing a startled expression on his face.

“Who...who are you?” Changmin finally managed to ask.

“I-” the man began, before pausing and looking to Changmin’s girlfriend.

Changmin noticed that exchange right away, and that small second fed him with more information than he would like to have.

He turned to his girlfriend. “You actually-”

“Changmin, listen to me,” she pleaded, except her words sounded as though she were yelling at him from the end of a tunnel.

“G-Get out,” Changmin commanded.

The girl’s eyes widened, as if she couldn’t believe Changmin said that, and quite frankly, Changmin couldn’t believe it either.

“Changmin,” she tried again.

“SHUT UP!” Changmin yelled, tears falling from his eyes. “Get out! Both of you just get out!”

Obviously startled, the two of them obeyed, making their way out the door. Changmin didn’t even bother to make eye contact with them as they walked past him.

Changmin collapsed onto the floor after hearing the door shut, hugging his knees to his chest. He choked, tears falling from his eyes as he tried to piece together what just happened.

* * *

Changmin called his ex-girlfriend a few days later, only so she can pick up all of her stuff. He packed everything himself for two reasons; he was still a gentleman, despite his anger, and he wanted her out of the apartment as soon as possible.

“We were together for six years,” Changmin reminded her as she grabbed the last box of her things. “Wh-why…?”

He put his entire heart and soul into this relationship. It wasn’t fair that she cheated. He at least deserved an explanation.

Instead of explaining herself, she simply shook her head. “I’m sorry,” she muttered, before taking her leave.

* * *

“I’m sorry, sir,” the man said. “But I really can’t figure out what’s wrong with your watch.”

Yunho sighed. He had taken his watch to four shops already, and none of them could give him any answers.

After his father died, Yunho spent a whole week at home, just crying and handling his grief in every way his father said he shouldn’t.

Yunho didn’t recognize anything around him other than his own sadness. Nothing else mattered to him after his father died. Yunho barely noticed how much time passed before he finally got himself to eat something. There was no way he would notice something as small as a broken watch.

It took him longer than it should have to realize that his father’s watch had stopped ticking, and Yunho cursed his luck, because of course the watch would stop working once it was passed onto him.

Yunho is about to take his leave when in walks a tall man with doe eyes and messy curly hair, carrying a broken clock and a look of shame.

Yunho heads out the door, heading to the last shop on his list.

* * *

“I’m sorry, Dad,” Yunho mutters, sitting in front of his dad’s grave. “I...I broke your watch. I don’t know what I did but…”

Yunho sighs. His dad left that watch so Yunho knew he would never be left alone. It wasn’t working. Yunho felt more alone than ever, and he wasn’t sure if it had anything to do with the defective pocket watch.

“Daddy,” Yunho chokes. He hasn’t called his father that since he was a child. “I need you. I really need you.”

Yunho just sat there and cried, tightly holding the pocket watch in his hand.

* * *

Changmin has no job, no girlfriend, and no coffee.

He sighs as he realizes how empty his cabinets were.

Money wasn’t an issue at the moment. He had only lost his job a week ago, and Changmin had saved a lot of money while he was working. While Changmin hated how idle his life had become, he also didn’t feel up to looking for a new job for the time being.

His motivation to do something as simple as go to the store was lacking. Obtaining a new job would be an even harder task for him to handle.

He never felt like leaving the apartment much right now. He’d look out the window, seeing people living happy lives, and suddenly he’d feel anxious.

He’d get ready to leave, his hand on the door handle, before he freezes in fear of running into his ex-girlfriend.

He would suddenly have an appetite for a certain restaurant, but would then feel as if he didn’t belong anywhere before deciding to get food delivered instead.

He had only left the apartment once, and that was to fix a clock he had broken in a temper tantrum he had a few days ago. The clock in its broken state was an embarrassing reminder of the fit of rage he had, but he also liked that clock, and didn’t want to throw it away. He suppressed his panic, just for that moment, going to a local shop to get it fixed; he didn’t care how much it cost as long as it got done.

But for some reason, he really wanted to go outside again.

Changmin sighed, pulling out his phone and researching a new travel spot.

Maybe some time outside of the city was exactly what he needed.

* * *

Yunho’s car broke down, and he wondered what else in his life was on its way to sudden destruction.

There was a bus stop close by to his apartment, anyway. He didn’t mind taking the bus until he finally motivated himself to get the car fixed.

_Old piece of junk._

And as much as Yunho would have loved to use the excuse of car troubles to avoid the necessary tasks he had to do today, he couldn’t procrastinate any longer.

He had to clean out his father’s house.

He also had to settle affairs in regards to the small inn his family owned.

He had been putting it off for a while.

His father was dead, he had to accept that eventually.

But cleaning out the house, filtering out what was to be kept and what he would get rid of, it all seemed so wrong.

Managing the assets pertaining to the inn felt wrong as well.

All of this just felt so wrong.

But he also knew it was necessary. His father had prepared him for this day, and he had to honor that responsibility, no matter how painful it would be.

His parents lived in a small town just outside of the city. It was the most peaceful drive Yunho always got to experience. The scenic views looked like something right out of a romantic movie. The grass was always green, the roads always clear, and the weather was always beautiful. Yunho could never be in a bad mood when observing the scenery.

Yunho sighed as he leaned his head on the window.

He was almost to his destination. While he felt warmth in his heart as he approached his childhood home, he was also dreading his arrival. For the first time he would come home, and no one would be there waiting for him. No one would be there to hug him and welcome him with open arms.

And that made Yunho feel more alone than ever.

* * *

Changmin fiddled with his sketchbook as he sat on the bus.

He realized that he wanted to draw something.

Changmin hadn’t picked this sketchbook up in a while, not since he walked in on-

He shuddered at the memory.

He had found a bus that drove to a small town just outside the city. Changmin figured he could spend a few hours here, walking around and drawing the sights that inspired him. He smiled as he looked out the window. He could tell his destination was close as the plethora of buildings turned into grasslands and farms.

_It’s all so beautiful_

Changmin couldn’t help but smile as he watched the trees whizzing by.

With a sigh, he opened his sketchbook, mindlessly flipping the pages at his old drawings. He couldn’t wait to add something new to these pages.

He stopped as he flipped to the last drawing. His throat constricted as he saw the delicate strokes of his pencil. Her eyes, her lips, her soft hair-

Changmin closed his sketchbook and looked out the window for the rest of the trip.

* * *

Yunho felt a weight lifted off his shoulders as he made it back to the bus stop.

As expected, his visit to his old house didn’t go well.

After shedding an unreasonable amount of tears, Yunho carelessly packed most of his father’s belongings away. Without his own vehicle, transporting the stuff he wanted to keep would be a hassle.

He managed to pack some of his own things into an old backpack. His father used to nag Yunho about taking some of his things in the house that “took up space for no reason”.

_I finally did it, Dad. Happy now?_

Another item Yunho brought with him was his dad’s old camera, hanging the object around his neck for security. The camera was something the older man was so attached to. Yunho’s father was always so sentimental, and this camera helped him save more memories than he could count.

Yunho would never get rid of it.

Yunho realized that he wasn’t composed enough to even begin handling leftover business at the resort, so he decided to once again hold it off and go back home.

The bus arrived, partially blocking the sunlight burning Yunho’s eyes.

He got on the bus as soon as the doors opened, brushing shoulders with someone exiting the vehicle.

Yunho swore he had seen that man before.

* * *

“You should come by this town again,” the barista suggested to Changmin as she served his drink and array of pastries.

After a few hours of drawing, Changmin came to a coffee shop he ended up falling in love with. Their pastries tasted amazing, and the shop had the peaceful atmosphere Changmin was craving.

Changmin nodded at the barista’s suggestion. He had felt better than he had in a long time, and he was sure it had everything to do with this trip.

“I know you’re only here for a day,” she continued. “But you should come by again and check out The Lotus Resort.”

“Lotus Resort?” Changmin repeated.

The barista nodded. “It’s a cute little inn about a mile away from here,” she explained. “It’s a great place to relax. The owner recently died, but he made sure the inn was left in good hands.”

Changmin sipped his coffee.

Maybe a return trip would come sooner than he anticipated.

* * *

Hojun had come by to Yunho’s apartment a day after Yunho’s first attempt at visiting his old home.

Hojun had a friend that was a therapist, and insisted Yunho set an appointment.

“I don’t need a therapist, Hojun,” Yunho objected. “I just need time.”

“Yunho, I know losing your father was painful, and I would never fault you for grieving,” Hojun replied. “But you’re losing yourself too. And I can’t let that happen. I promised I wouldn’t.”

Yunho sighed. “Hojun-”

“Please,” Hojun said. He wasn’t going to allow Yunho to make any new excuses to not get better. “Even if you just go once, please do it. If you won’t do it for yourself, do it for your father.”

* * *

Changmin wasn’t sure why he had a sudden breakdown as he took a shower.

He was standing under the hot water pelting his skin, and then his chest started heaving, tears were falling from his eyes, and his knees went weak.

He collapsed onto the floor, the water still hitting him as he tried to catch his breath.

He sobbed, feeling his chest constrict.

It hurt. Why did everything hurt so much?

Changmin felt pathetic. He had no idea why he was acting like this. His heart was racing at a what felt like a thousand beats per minute.

 _Breathe!_ The last rational part of his brain was screaming at him. _Breathe and get yourself together! Everything’s fine!_

He wasn’t sure what was going on, but just as quickly as it started, it stopped.

Changmin took deep breaths, in and out, until his heart rate reduced to a bearable level.

He ended his shower, afraid of a repeat of whatever episode he just experienced.

After quickly drying himself off, he threw on a white tank top and a pair of boxers.

Wiping away the steam from the mirror, he took a look at himself. He looked a lot better than he felt, and that was a plus.

_Shim Changmin. What is the matter with you?_

* * *

Yunho’s therapy session went better than he realized.

Jungsu was really nice to talk to. Hojun was right; Yunho did feel a little better once he was done.

Once Yunho made it home, he took a shower, letting the hot water relieve some of the tension in his joints.

He had to go back to the resort tomorrow and stop being a coward. Yunho shuddered at the thought. He knew, after all of this, the inn would still belong to him and his family. But he couldn’t understand why doing this would feel as if he were just erasing his parents from history.

Yunho was dreading the next day. It was driving him insane just thinking about it.

He turned off the shower, drying himself off and lazily throwing on a white tank top and a pair of boxers.

He brought his hand to the bathroom mirror and wiped away the residual steam.

_I just have to finish this one thing, and hopefully it will all be over soon._

* * *

Changmin didn’t understand how he managed to get lost.

He forgot to charge his phone, so it ended up dying halfway through the bus ride. That wasn’t too much of a problem at first; he wasn’t expecting any calls anyway.

Once the bus stopped, Changmin got off and headed to the nearest gas station, where he bought himself a map and a bottle of water.

He wanted to go somewhere to draw for a bit before going to the resort.

Changmin found his muse a few minutes later; a little farm not too far from the gas station.

Changmin sat at a bench nearby, drawing and taking in the sights for a few hours before he began his walk to the resort.

But Changmin must have taken a wrong turn somewhere, because what was supposed to be a fifteen minute walk turned into thirty.

Having a dead phone in an unfamiliar town was never a comforting situation.

Changmin kept walking, hoping to run into someone that could help guide him. Changmin was born and raised in the big city, so it came as a shock being in this small town where so many homes and stores were so far apart from each other.

However, his prayers were answered as he saw a brown hatchback driving in his direction.

He waved the driver down, hoping the driver wasn’t a serial killer.

As much as Changmin hated his life right now, he wasn’t exactly ready to die.

“Hey,” the driver said as he drove up to Changmin and rolled the window down. “Are you okay?”

There was something comforting about the man’s smile, and Changmin sighed in relief. He excitedly pulled out his map. “I’m looking for this place,” he said, pointing to a star he drew on the map.

“Ah,” the driver replied. “The Lotus Resort.”

Changmin nodded.

“I’m heading there now,” he said. “Why don’t you hop in?”

There was something trustworthy about this man. “Really?” Changmin asked.

The driver nodded. “Of course. Get in.”

Changmin accepted the invitation, rushing into the car and placing his backpack onto his lap. “Thank you so much,” he said as he put on his seatbelt.

“No problem,” the driver said with a smile. “By the way, my name’s Yunho. What’s yours?”

“Changmin,” he answered.

“Changmin,” Yunho repeated to himself. “It’s really nice to meet you.”

Changmin couldn’t remember the last time he smiled so much.

* * *

A few minutes later, They arrived at The Lotus Resort, and Changmin checked in right away.

“Hey, Changmin,” Yunho said.

Changmin turned to face him, looking at Yunho curiously as he waited for him to continue speaking.

“It’s...been really nice talking to you,” he began. “Can we hang out again?”

Changmin paused. He wasn’t expecting such an offer.

“If you don’t want to that’s okay,” Yunho said quickly, thinking Changmin’s hesitation was a form of rejection.

Changmin quickly shook his head. “No, Yunho. I’d love to meet again.”

Yunho’s eyebrows raised in surprise, a big smile crossing his face. “Really?”

Changmin nodded.

Yunho glanced over at the reception desk. “I have a few things I need to take care of,” he said. “Why don’t you get settled in?” Yunho suggested. “What’s your room number? I’ll find you when I get done.”

“Fifteen,” Changmin answered quickly.

“Fifteen,” Yunho muttered to himself. He smiled again. “Okay, Changmin. I’ll get you when I’m done.”

* * *

By the time Yunho was done, the moon had risen and most of the patrons started heading to bed.

Yunho felt terrible. He didn’t mean for everything to take so long.

Changmin was probably already asleep, but Yunho decided to knock on his door anyway.

Imagine his surprise when Changmin opened the door a few seconds later, a smile plastered on his face. His hair was even more disheveled than before, and for some reason, Yunho found that very amusing.

“Hey, Changmin,” Yunho said with a sigh. “I’m so sorry for taking this long. I had-”

“It’s okay,” Changmin reassured him. “This is your family’s business. You needed to take care of it.”

Yunho froze. He didn’t remember telling Changmin that his parents founded this resort. How did he know?

“The maid told me,” Changmin said, as if he read Yunho’s mind. “She saw us walking in together.” He bit his lip, shifting his gaze to the floor before looking back at Yunho again. “I’m really sorry for your loss.”

Yunho nodded. He never really knew how to respond to that statement. “If you’re not too tired, we could still go out if you’d like?”

Changmin let out an embarrassed laugh. “Quite honestly, I dozed off while I was waiting for you. I only woke up about ten minutes ago.”

“Then you and I are both great at timing, it seems,” Yunho joked.

“Let’s go,” Changmin said. “There’s still a lot of this place that I’d like to see.”

Changmin quickly put on his shoes, grabbed his backpack, and followed Yunho out of the resort and into his car.

Yunho ended up driving Changmin to the river bank, one of the reason’s his family resort was such a hotspot.

“You said you came to this town to clear your head,” Yunho said, remembering their previous car ride together. “I used to come here a lot for that very reason.” He parked the car and turned to Changmin, a big smile on his face. “Wanna build a fire?”

Changmin raised an eyebrow in confusion.

Yunho was out of the car and opening the trunk before Changmin could respond. Sure enough, Changmin exited the car to find Yunho pulling out three logs of wood and a backpack.

Changmin sat and watched as Yunho quickly put together a small pit before throwing down the logs and lighting a fire. _He must do this a lot,_ Changmin concluded as Yunho sat down next to him.

“Thanks for coming with me,” Yunho said.

That statement threw Changmin, because why would Yunho be thanking him for that? This place was obviously Yunho’s sanctuary. If anything, Changmin thought he should be apologizing to Yunho for invading his territory.

“I always came here alone,” Yunho continued, turning his attention to the fire. “But I think having someone with me is also nice. So thank you. Today, I felt a lot better than I have in a long time. Call me crazy, but I think you had something to do with that.”

It was as if Yunho read Changmin’s mind.

Changmin seemed to have lost his voice. He couldn’t get himself to respond.

“You don’t talk much, do you?” Yunho guessed.

“I...I really don’t,” Changmin confessed shyly. “I’m trying to change that though. But...it’s just hard.”

Yunho shrugged. “I don’t see why you need to change that,” he replied. “There’s nothing wrong with that. My dad wasn’t a talkative guy either. I take after my mom in the ‘can’t ever shut up’ department.”

By the way Yunho had brushed off his condolences from earlier, Changmin could tell Yunho didn’t want to dwell on his father for too long, so Changmin tried to change the subject.

“What about your mom?” Changmin asked. “Have you gone to see her recently?”

Yunho sighed. “Yeah,” Yunho answered. “My dad was buried next to her.”

Well there went that plan.

“Sorry,” Changmin said. “I didn’t-”

“It’s fine,” Yunho replied. “It happened, and it’s something that I have to deal with, right?”

Changmin shook his head. “You lost both of your parents. I can’t ever imagine feeling such pain. You should be allowed to grieve.”

“My mom died of cancer ten years ago,” Yunho explained. “Just recently, my father died of some genetic disorder that eventually killed his heart.”

Changmin exhaled, staring into the fire. Suddenly Changmin’s problems were insignificant. How does anyone prepare for their parents’ death?

“What about you?” Yunho asked, breaking Changmin’s train of thought.

“What do you mean?” Changmin asked.

“You just picked up and decided to come here for no reason,” Yunho said. “But there’s always a reason. I spent a significant chunk of my childhood working in my parents’ resort to know that.”

“I’m trying to get back into drawing,” Changmin said. “This place is so beautiful.”

“You draw?” Yunho asked in amazement.

Changmin was glad that it was dark, because he was sure he was blushing uncontrollably. Yunho seemed so impressed for no reason. “I’m not very good,” Changmin said.

Yunho shook his head. “Something tells me you’re just being modest,” he replied. “Can I be the judge of that? Do you have anything you can show me?”

Changmin nodded, reaching over to his backpack and pulling out his sketchbook. “There’s a few in there,” he said as he handed it to Yunho. “Like I said, I’m not that good.”

Yunho shook his head as he flipped through the pages. “Nonsense, Changmin,” he argued. “These are amazing. You don’t give yourself enough credit.”

Changmin laughed shyly. “You think so?”

“Yes,” Yunho answered. He flipped another page and gasped at a sketch of a jungle picture. “So good.” He flipped to the next page and paused, tilting his head in curiosity. “Who’s the mystery girl?”

Changmin looked away. The smile on his face instantly vanished. Yunho noticed Changmin’s change of demeanor right away.

“Oh,” Yunho said. “This is why you came here.”

“What?” Changmin asked.

Yunho pointed to the sketch. “This girl,” he said. “She’s the reason you’re here, right?”

Changmin bit his lip. He noticed Yunho’s eyes soften, and Changmin felt pathetic once more.

“What happened, Changmin?” Yunho asked.

Changmin shook his head. “Nothing I can’t handle,” he replied. “She’s out of my life for good. That’s what’s important.”

“When my mom died,” Yunho said suddenly, surprising Changmin. “I could tell my dad was hurting a lot more than he showed. My mother was the only woman he had ever loved. They met when they were just teenagers. It makes sense that my father felt like a hole had been formed in his life after my mother passed. Life with my mother was the only life my father knew.”

“Your parents were soulmates,” Changmin commented. “It’s not fair death separated the two of them.”

Yunho nodded. “When my dad’s condition got worse,” he continued. “My dad didn’t really put up a fight to stay alive or get better. He just wanted to be with my mother again. It’s selfish of me to be so sad that he’s gone. My parents are together again.”

“Yunho, that’s not selfish,” Changmin said. “They’re your parents. You love them and they were taken away from you.”

“I miss them,” Yunho admitted. “And I’ll always miss them.”

Changmin shivered a bit, hugging his arms around his chest.

“Are you cold?” Yunho asked. “I have a few blankets in the car.”

Before Changmin could answer, Yunho jumped up and made his way to the car, opening the trunk and grabbing two blankets. He gave one to Changmin as he sat back down, and both of them loosely wrapped the blankets around their shoulders.

“I was fired from my job,” Changmin suddenly said after a few beats of silence. “So I came home early to find my girlfriend cheating on me.”

Yunho had to make sure he heard correctly. “What?” he asked.

Changmin nodded. “I texted her to say that I was on my way home,” he added. “She didn’t have her phone nearby so she didn’t know I was coming.”

Yunho’s mouth hung open. “Changmin...I’m so sorry.”

“I had suspected it for a while,” Changmin admitted. “She became distant, you know? Going out and coming home at odd times; being secretive about her phone calls. The signs were all there, I was just too stupid to see it.”

“You weren’t stupid,” Yunho said. “You were in love; you were in denial. Of course you don’t want to believe your girlfriend was cheating.”

Changmin scoffed.

Yunho grabbed the sketch book again and opened to the drawing of Changmin’s ex-girlfriend. “You’re a great guy, Changmin,” Yunho said. “Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“You’re just saying that,” Changmin accused.

Yunho shook his head. “I really mean it,” he said. “You’re so pleasant to be around and I pray this girl didn’t ruin your ability to see that.”

“You think the fact that I still keep that picture of her is stupid?” Changmin asked. He wasn’t sure why he felt so defensive all of a sudden.

Yunho shook his head. “It’s hard for us to let go of people we love,” he said. “Even if that person never loved us back.”

Changmin wordlessly took his sketchbook from Yunho’s hands. He suddenly ripped out his ex-girlfriend’s picture, causing Yunho to jump in surprise.

“What?” Changmin innocently asked Yunho, who was staring at him with his mouth hanging open.

“I just...wasn’t expecting that,” Yunho answered.

Changmin shrugged. “Me neither,” he said truthfully. “But honestly, I’ve been doing a lot of surprising things recently.”

“Hey, I’m impressed,” Yunho said.

Changmin stared at the picture once more. He thought about the past six years he spent on the relationship. They were what he thought were the best years of his life, and everything seemed to crash down in a second.

Changmin remembered everything that went through his mind once the mental fog cleared. Did he do something wrong? Did he drive her away? Maybe he put in too many hours at work?

Maybe she never loved him in the first place.

Before he could stop himself, Changmin threw the picture into the fire.

Yunho’s eyes widened. “Whoa,” he whispered. “Are you okay, Changmin?”

Changmin smiled, turning to Yunho. “I’m fine,” he answered. “I’m fine.”

Yunho nodded. “I’m sorry you had to go through that,” he said.

Changmin shook his head. “I thought we were meant to be,” he scoffed, shaking his head, “how wrong was I?”

“She’s the wrong one in all of this,” Yunho corrected.

Changmin sighed. “Maybe it’s a good thing I got fired,” he concluded. “How long would she have played me for a fool if I didn’t come home early that day?”

“You already had your suspicions,” Yunho reminded him. “You would have found out anyway.”

“I guess,” Changmin replied with a shrug.

Yunho swallowed. “My dad said everyone has a sign when they’ve met their soulmate,” he said. “I always thought what he said was stupid. But sometimes, I wish we really did have those signs. It would make us less prone to heartbreak.”

“What was your dad’s sign?” Changmin asked.

Yunho laughed. “I wish I knew,” he said.

“I’m sure your dad knew what he was talking about,” Changmin said. “Our younger minds are just too dumb to comprehend.”

Yunho laughed. “Yeah,” he said. “My dad had his own coded language that even I have trouble understanding.”

“I hope you get your sign, though,” Changmin said. “And I hope I get mine too.”

Yunho smiled. “You will,” he said, putting his hand on Changmin’s shoulder. “We both will.”

Changmin smiled. “You think your parents will help you figure out your sign?”

Yunho nodded. “They said that even in death, they’d be with me,” he said. “I think helping me find my true love is one of their ways.” Yunho chuckled before reaching into his pocket and pulling out the watch his father gave him. “My dad left me a-”

Yunho froze as he looked at the watch.

“Yunho?” Changmin asked in concern, noticing Yunho’s sudden change in demeanor. “What’s wrong?”

Yunho shook his head. He couldn’t believe it. He looked at Changmin, his eyebrows furrowed in bewilderment. “Nothing,” he finally answered, shaking his head. “I’m fine.”

He looked at the watch once more.

His watch was ticking again.

* * *

Yunho promised his father that he wouldn’t lose himself.

At first, it seemed like an easy promise to keep. However, Yunho did have his difficulties. Some days, he’d pull out his phone, ready to call his father, before breaking into tears and bawling because he remembered that he didn’t have a father to call anymore.

He’d wake up during the first Saturday of the month, ready to head over to his father’s house to keep their tradition of watching movies together, before he realized that tradition died along with his father.

Every painful reminder seemed to drain Yunho of all his energy.

Which is why he was sure that he couldn’t have survived without Changmin.

Whenever Yunho couldn’t stop crying, his chest heaving and his face red and swollen, Changmin was there comfort him until he fell asleep.

Whenever the first Saturday of the month came around, Changmin would stay by Yunho’s side all day, not wanting Yunho to feel alone.

Whenever Yunho couldn’t sleep at night, Changmin would stay awake along with him, speaking softly to him until Yunho was calm again.

Yunho would never deny that Changmin saved him. It was because of Changmin that Yunho was back to being his bubbly self in a matter of time.

It had been a year since they met in Yunho’s hometown. That day was a day Yunho was forever grateful for.

The river bank now had a special place in their hearts, and eventually, they started visiting that place regularly.

They would ride into town early in the morning, visiting the coffee shop Changmin couldn’t stop gushing about. Then Yunho, being the responsible son, would check on his parents’ resort to make sure everything was still running smoothly. They’d eat lunch at whatever restaurant Yunho might have craved that day, before finally going to the riverbank to spend their evening.

Yunho looked to the weight on his right shoulder and smiled.

Changmin had placed his head on Yunho’s shoulder almost half an hour ago, and now, it seemed that Changmin had fallen asleep.

Yunho knew Changmin was extra tired today. He had been sick recently, and had trouble sleeping the night before.

Yunho had insisted that they cancel their plans for today and just stay home, but Changmin refused. They had this day planned, and Changmin didn’t want to stop them from going, especially since Changmin kept claiming that he felt much better than before.

Yunho brushed some of Changmin’s hair away from his face. He’d let him sleep a little more. Yunho adjusted the blanket wrapped around Changmin’s shoulders.

He turned to look at the fire and took a deep breath.

He hadn’t felt this type of serenity in a while, and it felt nice.

This had been a great day for Yunho. It had been a great couple of months for Yunho.

His father’s death was painful, but if it hadn’t been for his father’s death, Yunho was sure he wouldn’t have met Changmin.

Maybe his dad wasn’t lying when he said that he’d always help Yunho.

Yunho wrapped his right arm around Changmin, pulling the younger one closer to him. Changmin responded by nuzzling his face on Yunho’s shoulder.

Yunho knew Changmin still had residual pain from the way things ended with his ex-girlfriend. He noticed Changmin sometimes getting anxious when Yunho was gone for too long. He noticed the way Changmin talked himself down; assuming he didn’t deserve to be loved, thinking he did everything wrong when it came to trying to make Yunho happy. It all angered Yunho because Changmin’s ex-girlfriend hurt him in so many other ways than she’ll ever realize.

Yunho swore he would do everything he could to reverse the damage done.

They both had healing to do, and Yunho was fine with that.

They had each other, and that made every other challenge in life bearable.

Yunho reached into his pocket, pulling out his watch. He opened the cover, smiling as he watched the hand tick second by second.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I've made based off a music video. How did I do? I hope you all liked it.  
> I know the MV was really cute and happy, which is why I'm not sure how I turned it into an angst story...  
> Anyway, thanks for reading!


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